My real me
by GG-Triela
Summary: When Sora's best friend left her. She becomes very depressed and can't come out of it. No one seems to understand and knows who she truly is. (Sorato)
1. Chapter one

This story is all told in the POV of Sora. This could change the storyline a bit and like… But yeah, anyway. Here it is.

My real me

 I sat down on my chair, thinking. 'How could she? How ever….'

After her best friend Mimi left, everything went darker and darker. Hard to imagine such a thing… Once in your life, you had a best friend, than she left to America, never seeing her… ever again.

'Pff, I can't sit here like a nothing. I still have my other friends, Right…?' I was unsure.

Of course, I have my other friends… But still, Mimi seems to be different. 

'Anyway, I'll go to sleep now. No time to think and be here all depressed'

I soon drifted to an unpleasant dream.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

_There was a Digimon at my house. A virus-type. I don't know his name. First, I called Koushiro. He would be arriving any moment with his Digi-Vice and his computer. _

_He searched everything about that Digimon. _

_"We can't beat him on our own," He said to me. "call Taichi and Yamato"_

_I did as I was told. A few minutes later they entered my house also. As too was Stingmon, but I couldn't find Ken. _

_I let Biyomon Digi-volv to Birdramon. Taichi and Yamato as well. But they aren't strong enough. Taichi and Yamato were discussing everything with Koushiro. _

_I was outside… I was doing nothing. It was winter. I saw my garden full of… ice. I had skate-shoes and so I started to skate. Very sad. I couldn't do it in the beginning, I was falling constantly. But I was back on my feet immediately. Taichi and Yamato laughed at me. _

_But that wasn't everything. Koushiro couldn't join us fighting. He once was on his way outside, it's 2 steps down. After the first he passed out. Taichi and Yamato didn't seem to recognise. I helped him back on his feet. _

_Taichi__ and Yamato could do everything better than me. They also called Daisuke to help them to beat the Digimon in my house. While it was my house, and my cell phone._

_I kept skating outside. Little by little, it went better. I fell again because of the wind. I felt lonely… and left out . I would never be the same after my best friend had left… _

_Bye Mimi _

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Hi!

Thanks all to read my story. Please review also. I know I can write typo's… I'm sorry for that! Please correct me if I do so. 

Bye. 

Ow, still one more thing: It could take long until I update this story. But I'll do my best, I promise. 


	2. Chapter two

Hiya all! I'm back… this is quick, ne-?

I hope you did like my first chapter…

Anyway, here's the next one!

My real me

I woke up in a flash. Sweat dripping of my head.

'Where the hell did that came from? This really can't be true. Taichi and Yamato never will betray me…'

I felt worried. Not sure about what this dream meant.

'I'll call Yamato and see what he says about it'

I set up, and walked to the mirror. I looked deep in my reflection. I saw I was still tired 

and worried. 

'I'll go back to sleep than, if I'm still tired'

But I couldn't sleep another time. The dream kept running through my head. 

'Damn… What is the time?' I searched around in my room, looking for a clock. 

It said it was 8:15AM. 

'So early… I will go downstairs for some breakfast. Then I will see further'

I did as I thought. Walked slowly down the stairs. 

After my breakfast, I dressed, and called Yamato.

[Moshi Moshi, Ishida speaking] Yamato sounded on the other line.

"Hi, Yamato. It's me." I answered. 

[Ow, Hi Sora. How are you?] 

"Well, I'm… not so good… actually"

[Oh? What's the matter, than?] 

"I dreamed very bad… It's kind of hard to explain." My voice was kind of shaky.

[That bad that you're all shaking? Are you sure there's nothing else?]

"Only that Mimi left. My dream was about that too"

[How strange… Do you want me to come over?] 

"Don't you have to practise with your band today? "

[I'll take my agenda… Nope. I'm free this weekend] He laughed a bit.

"Ok than… You can come if you like to.  But… if you can't... –"

[Oh, no. It's okay, really. See ya later]

"Ok, bye"

I put the phone back to its receiver. Thinking.

'Is this really ok? I mean… Pff… what the hell, he comes, it's to late to cancel now'

I walked down the stairs again. 

Later I found myself watching the TV, until Yamato arrived.

"Hi" He said when he arrived.

"Hi" I welcomed back.

"Pff, you shouldn't have to come… -"

"Sora! Wake up!" He said while shaking me a little by my shoulders.

"You're not dreaming anymore, Sora! This is reality, I'm here. And tell me what's 

going on." He told me with a commanding voice.

"Okay than… Come inside. I'll tell you."

He came along after me. Looking a little shocked with the way I was behaving. 

When we sat, he began to talk.

"So, can you tell me what you dreamed about?"

"Promise me you won't laugh and tell it to anybody?"

"Yes, I promise."

"Well … " I told the whole story to him. He kept listening very carefully. 

"Strange… Especially that me and Taichi were your 'enemy's' or whatever you like to 

call it."

"I know… It's not that I hate you or something."

"I know you don't. It's also suspicious that it's just after the day Mimi left."

"Also… It's kind of strange to say, but… I feel something is empty… missing..."

Suddenly he gave me a tight hug.

"Everything will be ok, Sora. It's normal to be a little depressed now. You'll come over 

it. And I will do anything to make you feel better." 

"Thanks" I hugged him back. Then, he let go. 

"No problem. I'll go back home now. If you need anything, please call me. OK?"

"Yes, I will. Bye, and thanks again." As I lead him out of my house. 

'That sure was a relief to talk to someone' I thought. As I went my day further, try to set this dream out of my mind. 

This is it people! My 2nd chapter. It could take longer until I update it now…

Anyway, thanks for reading at, and I like to see you again!

Please be so nice to review also!

Bye! 


	3. Chapter three

Hi!

I'm back again. This didn't take long… ne-?

I know this story is kind of sad… But it's the purpose… you know ^^'

Anyway, here's the third chapter.

My real me

* One year later *

 ~flashback~  
I opened the drawer, looking for something… It was the drawer where the knifes  
were lying. I was looking for the sharpest…  
'I want to cut… cut myself… It needs to get out somewhere'  
Finding what I was looking for, I grabbed it, putting it on my arm.   
Then I pushed it in my skin. Until blood came out.  
I was satisfied. I have done it. Now some tension came out…  
I put the knife back in the drawer. Looking at my edge.  
I heard mom driving in. I immediately put my sweater on, so that she couldn't see it. 

~flashback~

'I wish I didn't do that… Now I have to tell mom I did this'  
I already went to the social assistant to look for help. Everyday I became sadder and sadder. People didn't recognise me anymore with my behaviour.  
"Mom"  
"Yes, dear?"  
"Can I talk to you for a moment?"  
"Yes, any time, sure." She answered my question.  
'No turning back right now… You have to say it' I thought as I encouraged myself.  
"So," I started. "You'll probably saw this before." Showing her the edge.  
"Yes, I did."  
"Well, I cut myself."  
"And why?"  
"I did have no special reason… Just my tension was too high. I just did it."  
Silent filled the room.  
"Why didn't you told me right before?"  
"I couldn't. You weren't there and I just didn't want to. You don't seem to understand me completely."  
"What do you mean?"  
"I told you before, I said I want to talk to a psychologist, but you did not listen. You thought it was a dumb thing and that I just was in a bad mood again."  
Silence again.   
"I really want to talk to someone. I feel disordered. But someone who does understand me."  
"Sora, you have so many friends! Don't they understand you?"  
"No… Only Mimi did. Now she's gone. The only person who I often talk with is Yamato. But still… It's not that when I talk to someone, that it's solved."  
"That is true."  
"Now I talk to the social assistant of the school too, that does help something. But that doesn't solve the problem."  
A sigh came out of my mother her mouth.  
"I'll think about this. Not now, it's late. Go to bed, and try to get some sleep. Ok?"  
"Yes… Goodnight mom."  
"Bye, sweet dreams."  
She left my room, closing the door silently behind her.  
I tried to sleep. After one hour, I finally felt asleep.

This is it!  
The 3rd chapter. I know it's kind of short always… I'm not so good at writing very long chapters…  
Anyway, I hope you enjoyed it and that I will enjoy it much better when you review!  
So please review…  
Bye!


	4. Chapter four

Hi!  
I'm back…. Already…  
I'm really disappointed that I don't get any reviews…  
Is it really that bad or something?  
Please let me know… I'm up to something, I don't mind somebody telling that my fanfic is bad, just don't flame you know…  
Anyway, here's the next chapter.

My real me  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 

"Take her to prison" a police officer said.  
'Oh my god… I can't believe this. I can't believe I actually killed somebody.' I thought.  
Hand-cuffs came around my hands, but they were too tight around my wrists.  
"Ouch" I complained. "It's too tight"  
"Shut up. You have no right to talk" the officer demanded.  
I did as I was told. Just followed the officer into the police-car.  
I became sad, my face was cold.   
Once in prison, it was awful. They took me to a lady, who was very gentle.   
She gently put the hand-cuffs off my hand. My wrists were red from pain.  
"Don't worry," She said, trying to comfort me a little. "you shouldn't be long here"  
I didn't answer. I was deeply in thought, I fell asleep.  
After I short while, I awoke again. She told me something, I didn't understand.  
"Come, follow me" she said than, grabbing my hand.  
I jumped of the table, following her.  
An elevator came in my view.  
"No, not an elevator!" I cried, trying to run back.  
"It's okay, Sora. I'm with you" The woman comforted, pulling me into the elevator.  
I stood there… Scared, frightened, looking nervous around the little room.  
Finally the door opened. I ran outside it. The lady still holding my hand. 

"This way" As we headed into another room.  
I saw children playing happily with toys.   
"Hi" They all greeted my friendly. I didn't give any reply.  
"There's your bed, Sora." The lady said, while showing me my bed. I sat on it. Put my blankets over me, and drifted to sleep again.   
"Wake up, Sora" A voice told me. I slowly opened my eyes, seeing the lady, her face smiling.  
"It's time for supper, Sora. Are you coming?" She showed her hand again.  
I took it, but give no reply. As I slowly walked with her to the dinner room.  
Several other children were there, eating and talking, like nothing was going. Like they were home.   
'I don't understand how they do that' I thought to myself.  
"There is your place." The lady showed me the place, as I sat down on the chair.  
On the table they were some bread and other stuff. I looked at it with disgust.   
"Aren't you hungry?" She asked.  
"No" For the first time, I gave an answer. Though my face was still cold.  
"Are you sure?"   
I nodded my head: yes.   
"Ok then…" She walked away, to somewhere else.   
I looked to all the other children whom were sitting there.  
It looked so… peaceful.  
'How can they be so happy while they're in prison?'   
After 10 minutes, the lady came back.  
"Sora, you can some and see your mom if you want to"  
I stood up, and followed the lady.   
"Wait a second." The lady walked to a mister and talked a little. I didn't understand what they were saying.  
I looked around a little. Then suddenly I saw my mother at a table, crying.  
My eyes widened. The lady came back again.  
"It's ok, you can go to your mother now. Come –"  
"I changed my mind, I don't want to."  
"Ow Sora, really? Are you sure?"  
"Yes"  
"Ok then…"

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 

I jumped awake.   
"What was that?" I said to myself.  
"A… prison?" I startled.  
But not soon after, I dreamed further.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 

I was depressed. Extremely depressed. Nothing could make me laugh anymore. My face was cold.  
I watched the others. They still were happy.  
'They have to be very optimistic then..' I thought.  
Then, I was taking a reconnaissance with the lady. I didn't take long.  
I was being obliged to go in the elevator again. But I didn't want it.  
I was blocking totally.   
"Take her back to her room. If she doesn't want it, then don't." A man told the woman.  
I was taken aback in my room. Alone. The others were on that reconnaissance.  
I didn't care though. All I did, was crying.   
After half an hour, they came back. Then, it was time for dinner.  
I was taken to the lunch hall again.   
I saw my food… It didn't show tasty. But I ate some of it.  
The others were talking so happy with that lady that was with us. I didn't… I looked,   
and listened. That's all.   
In the afternoon, I slept.   
At 6 o'clock, it was supper. When I went to the table, I saw my father was in lunch hall also. I saw my mother wasn't happy at all, but she did show it.  
"Hi!" She greeted me.  
"Hi" I answered, looking at the food. It was very weird… French fries with tomato-sauce.  
"How are you feeling, dear?"  
"Good" I lied, eating a little of the food.  
My mother had to leave then, she couldn't stay long.  
She gave me a kiss on my cheek and left.   
I saw my mother crying again once she was out of the hall.  
I started to cry also. The lady came again.  
"Are you coming with us to your room?" She asked gently.  
I nodded my head. As she took my hand again, and we left.   
We had to take the stairs, I didn't want to go in the elevator again.   
~ ~ ~ ~ ~

I awoke again. It was about 10AM.   
'That was one nasty dream.' I thought to myself. 

Wauw… my longest chapter until now ^^

I hope you did like it… I know it's kind of confusing with the dreaming parts and so…  
Anyway… I'd love to hear your opinion, so please review!  
Thanks, too.  
Bye!


	5. Chapter five

I know it took a while since I updated this story. It's just that I got some problems and so. It's not pleasant.

Anyway, spare me. Here's the next chapter, and to give an answer to my reviews, I'll try to explain it all here.

My real me

After I got dressed, I called Yamato.   
[Hello, this is Ishida speaking] He sounded on the other line.  
"Hi, Yamato. It's me."  
 [Hi! How are ya?]  
"I can't say. Can you come over, please?"  
[Yes, sure. Anything. When?]  
"Right now, if you can. My mom isn't home."  
[Ok, see ya then.]  
"Bye"  
I hang up the phone. Thinking about my dream again.  
'What could that mean? That I'm going to be in prison or something?'  
Ten minutes later, the door bell rang. I opened the door, and saw Yamato standing, breathing heavily. 

"Hi" He greeted.  
"Did you run all the way?" I asked, noticing the sweat over him.  
"Yeah, good for starting the day, isn't it?" he smirked.  
"I'm sure…" I gave him a strange look. "Shouldn't you get inside?"   
"Guess so"  
He walked with me into the living room and took a seat on the couch, like I did.  
"So, what's the problem?" he asked.  
I hung my head.  
"This night, I dreamed"  
He stared at me.  
"It wasn't just a normal dream, Yamato"   
"What is it?"  
I hung my head again. Silence grew between us.  
Tears soon filled my eyes. I tried to hold them back, but I failed.  
"What's wrong?"  
"I'm sorry" I sobbed.  
"Come here" He pulled me into a hug. I cried silently into his chest.   
"Sorry" I excused again when I pulled back, still hanging my head.  
'He probably thinks I'm very pathetic'  
"Don't be sorry"  
"You must think I'm very pathetic now"  
"I don't." he held my hand in his, it felt so warm. " I will never"  
Smile crept upon my lips.   
He still was holding me by my upper arm, looking incredibly concerned.  
Tears began to fill my eyes yet again.  
'He shows so much concern… He can't possible like me more than a friend, can he?  
I don't think I can handle that right now'  
We stared at each other for a few minutes.   
"Can you tell me what you have dreamed?" He asked me, letting me go.  
"Prison"  
"Prison? Did you do anything illegal?"  
"No! Not in real life, though. There, in my dream, I had killed somebody. And they took me to prison for that. And I was depressed."  
"You are depressed now, aren't you?"  
"I dunno. The point is: what's this has to do with my real life?"  
"Hm…" I saw he was thinking hard.   
'He really does do his best for me. I like it, though. It's good to feel he's always there for me. But I can't promise anything back….- '  
"A prison, huh? Perhaps you feel captive." He interrupted my thoughts.  
"I don't."   
"Pff, I dunno. I'm not a dream specialist, Sora. You know…"   
"I know. I'm sorry"  
"How many times are you going to say that? By the way, you don't have to be sorry, though."  
"Well, I am!"   
'Why am I getting mad?'  
"I just put you into all this. I feel so… I dunno how I feel"  
"Relax. Soon this will be all over. It's just a dream, right?"  
"And? I believe my dreams are meaningful. Whether you like it or not."  
"Don't get angry, will you? It's not that I don't believe that they mean something. But sometimes they're just fake."  
"I dunno… Something says me this isn't just a dream" Confusing feelings dancing in my mind.   
It grew silent for a moment. Until Yamato watched the clock. It read 11:45AM.  
"I think I have to go, my dad is home, and I think he'll be pleased if he gets lunch. When does your mother come?"  
"I dunno."  
"Why don't you come and eat with us?"  
"No, I can't do that. What if my mom comes home? – "  
"Leave a note. And I'm sure my father doesn't mind"  
"Okay than… You're sure it's fine?"  
"I'm positive."  
"Okay."

Pfff… I took me a while to write all this. I hope it's kind of better now.

Thanks to all who reviewed!

I'll put a special thanks in my next part. I (also) hope that will be updated sooner. Bye!


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